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Episode #310

Marketing For True Love: Joe Polish interviews Annie Lalla

Could you use marketing to find the love of your life? The similarities between dating and marketing are amazing and explored, in depth, in this episode of I Love Marketing where Joe Polish interviews Annie Lalla.

Annie Lalla has spent her life studying the world of emotions -mapping the complexities of communication & subtleties of relationships. A philosopher, speaker and a thought leader, Annie is known as the “Cartographer of Love”.

Here’s a glance at what you’ll learn from Annie in this episode:

  • How to use marketing to find the love of your life
  • Joe Polish and Annie Lalla discuss finding Joe’s soulmate
  • The similarities between dating and marketing
  • Do opposites REALLY attract? Here’s the surprising truth…
  • Annie shares her perspective on true love and intimacy
  • 3 most common mistakes people make when dating
  • Conscious Uncoupling: A healthier way to break up
  • How to transform relationship conflicts in a crucible for love
  • Relationship Depth and Duration: Standing for your partner’s growth and greatness

  • In many ways the highest use of marketing is in finding a soulmate. Love is the highest game a human being can play with their life.
  • The skill of marketing allows you to reach people, the same skill you need to connect in dating.
  • Nate’s experience with his personal ad was extremely polarizing. He received over a thousand letters of hate mail but also a number of very positive responses.
  • Mate signalling was the original form of advertising. Animals broadcast a high fitness level to convince potential mates to choose them.
  • Signalling, like advertising, can be honest or deceitful.
  • A long term relationship with a mate or a customer requires you to showcase who you are in an honest way.
  • You have to listen to you own system when it comes expressing yourself and when you’ve built up genuine trust.
  • If there is a part of you that you want to share but are unsure of, put it out there on the third time it comes up.
  • Ships can dock at your port, but only if you have room. Having a busy, hectic life is like having a crowded dock.
  • You have to try to break up with dignity retained on both sides.
  • Your dating bio should be a filtering mechanism that attracts the people you want to attract and repels the people you don’t want.
  • Your heart is a muscle, when it’s broken and bruised it can recover and become stronger.
  • Don’t be afraid to showcase your brilliance, humility is overrated. Don’t brag about yourself, demonstrate it.
  • The person you’re on a date with falls in love with themselves and who they get to be around you.
  • Dating is not about ‘good’ or ‘bad’, it’s about finding person who’s the right match.
  • Relationships pick up where dating leaves off. The approach for the short term dating game is very different than creating a long term relationship.
  • Life, dating, and relationships are a game. The question is are you playing a game that’s transparent and what your intentions are.
  • A relationship is like an entity that’s created between two people that ends up having it’s own needs and wants. When one shows promise, you focus your energy on it exclusively.
  • If you’ve been looking for a relationship for more than three months, you’re probably holding a fear of losing something you like about being single.
  • You should focus on being the best version of yourself so that you are proud to offer who you are to people.
  • Creating a dating profile can be the action that shifts something in your psyche that opens you up to possibility.
  • Most people make the mistake of tracking how they feel without paying attention to how the other person feels too.
  • Write a list of how you want to feel around another person instead of a list of features.
  • Every interaction you have with someone is practice for your future relationship.
  • Don’t write someone off too quickly, give them at least three dates. At the very least, you’ll get some good practice.
  • Whoever you are with is an indicator of your own self esteem.
  • Look for small moments of your life where you feel alive and delighted and you will build your belief that your life is interesting and worthy.
  • Most relationships are polarized between the ‘we’ and the ‘I’, and we become the student of the other.
  • A good relationship has a shared life purpose.
  • A divorce can usually be traced back to something you were ignoring in your partner early one, typically the messy, real person that you get to see after the first six months.
  • You can approach traits and behaviours you don’t like in a way that allows them to grow and take on the challenge of being better.
  • Every relationship can be upgraded. When the bond is strong, actually leaving someone is the final test.
  • You never stop marketing for possibility.
  • Each relationship that ends is a school that shows you parts of yourself that don’t serve love. Never break up in a fight, a real break up happens at the height of your connection.
  • You have to have the courage to mourn the death of a relationship.
  • You should gauge the success of a relationship by its depth, not just its duration.
  • Love is the best game going for feeling the highest spectrum of human experience.
  • If you are ready to find your partner, everyone you know and love should know so they can support you.

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